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Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Stephen King Discusses Opening Sentences

Posted on 14:05 by Unknown
I read an article today by Stephen King on why he spends months and even years writing his opening sentence.  (He does make it clear he doesn't do that, however, until after he's done drafting.)

But some of the things he said made me think.  For example, as the article goes on, he discusses how an opening line invites a reader to come here, to listen to this.  It made me go back and look at some of the opening lines of my books.  I think Ashes Ashes did great since the first line was "It was gut-check time."  All Fall Down's first line was "Something was wrong."  So maybe I've already been inviting my readers to "come here, listen to this."  That made me feel good.

Then he talks about how the opening sentences should pull you right inside the story and make you curious---maybe without you even realizing it.  I checked that one off, too.  Whew.

But then he talked about something that I have been working on.  Voice.  Which he says that a lot of people mistake for style.  He compares voice to singer Mick Jagger, for example, and that when you buy a Rolling Stones album, you know the voice and something in us will connect with that.  It's recognizable.

He gives us writing examples of writers we would know like that because they are distinctive and then says it's the same with a book, that the writer's "voice" will create an intimate connection with the reader. There are a few books and authors that do that for me, but I know it's an area I can work on in my books. Although I do know that when people pick up my books they will expect a lot of suspense and a little romance because that's my style.  But still, I want each of my readers to be able to experience the characters and stories in a way that will connect them and be intimately memorable through voice.  Maybe someday Mr. King will be using me as an example of distinctive voice and say, "If you pick up a Julie Coulter Bellon book you'll see what I'm talking about."  (Or maybe not.  The man might be dead before I get it right!)

One of the last things he talks about is how he composes in bed, right before he goes to sleep, just lying there in the dark, thinking.  If nothing else, that made me happy because I do that, too.  It's one of my best creative times, right before sleep, composing a scene in my head.  It always flows then, and I always struggle whether I should actually turn the light back on and write it down, or try to remember it in the morning.  (I have learned over and over that I need to get up and write it down.  This old brain doesn't remember a lot in the morning.  But, at least Mr. King and I have something in common with composing right before bed.)

If you want to read the whole article you can see it here (Warning, there is language).  I found his thoughts fascinating and even more so when I stacked my work against his advice.  What do you think about opening sentences?  Do they represent an invitation to you? Do they really hold that much weight for the reader in voice, style, and pulling you in?  Or is it the first few pages?
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Monday, 22 July 2013

Book Review: Just Like Elizabeth Taylor

Posted on 12:48 by Unknown
This book was unexpected for me.  It's called Just Like Elizabeth Taylor by LuAnn Staheli and it wasn't at all what I thought it would be.

This is the first book I've ever read by this author and I was impressed with her style and flow.  The story is about twelve-year-old Elizabeth who has a single mother and is dealing with watching her mother be physically abused by her boyfriend while Elizabeth is also being abused by the boyfriend's son.  Hard stuff to read for sure.  This is a sensitive and timely subject in today's world and this book could definitely be a conversation starter with parents and children.

Because of the subject matter and storyline, I thought Elizabeth would be a bit older, and was surprised to find out she's only twelve.  She was a complex character, but there were a few times during the story when her voice/thoughts/conversation were a little above her age. That being said, though, I loved the way Elizabeth interacted with people and how she tried to deal with the adult issues surrounding her.  There was one character that I would have liked to know more about her situation, she seemed so interesting and in somewhat of the same boat as Elizabeth, but it isn't told.  (Maybe I'm just nosy like that.)  Of course, that speaks to the skill of an author and a great cast of characters when you want to know more about them.

This book is full of some very real-life situations and reactions and if I let my pre-teen read it, I would definitely want to read it with them or have several discussions before, during, and after.  All in all, I think this author has a lot of talent and I am interested in reading more from her.

Here is the back copy:

Twelve-year-old Liz Taylor has known for a long time that she would escape—escape the abuse against herself, and against her mother. She just didn’t know how or when.

Then the perfect opportunity comes—money left of the table by her mother’s abuser—and Liz is on the run. But a girl her age doesn’t have many options when it comes to hideouts, making a K.O. A. Kampground and a nearby middle school her perfect choices.

If only she can keep to herself, Liz, now using the name Beth, knows she can make it on her own, until things change, and she realizes she must face her situation head on if she is to save herself and her mom.
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Friday, 19 July 2013

First Page Friday

Posted on 13:13 by Unknown
Today's First Page Friday sample was so interesting to me and Ms. Shreditor's remarks made it doubly so. I can't wait to hear what you think of it.

If you would like your first page critiqued by a national editor, please submit your double-spaced 12 pt. font first page to juliecoulterbellon@gmail.com with First Page Friday in the subject line.  There are two openings for August.

As always, thank you to Ms. Shreditor and to our authors for their time and effort.  See you next week!


The Entry
An Uncommon Blue
by Ryan Hancock

There are three unspoken rules in high school rugby.

1. Your team members are family.

2. You support your family.

3. This support must be shown periodically with an affectionate slap on the backside.

After four years as the starting right winger, I had almost gotten used to this.

Almost. At least I no longer felt the urge to bloody my teammates' noses when they tried it. But in the middle of the hall? No way. During school hours my glutes were off limits.

I whirled around to explain this to whichever of my idiotic team members was behind me.

Instead, I found myself face to face with an attractive redhead.

“Hey, Bruno,” Drea said with a smirk. “Ready for the test?”

I opened my mouth but no sound came out.

Even with her super-short hair, Drea was stunning. Before last summer she’d often been mistaken for a boy. But that all ended when puberty hit. With both fists.

I recovered from my embarrassment enough to nod.

She leaned against the lockers. Her face reflected the light from her blue palm as she twisted an earring. “History should be a breeze compared to pre-calc. I wanted to stab myself in the eye when I got to that section on antiderivatives.”

I grunted and fumbled with my combination.

Without warning she came up close and spoke in a half-whisper. Her hair smelled like coconut. “I know someone that likes you. If you hurry up with that lock, we might have time to talk before the final.”

Ms. Shreditor's Comments

I’ve read this first page several times to collect my thoughts. At first glance, it looks great because it’s clean as a whistle. I might tweak the punctuation here and there, but there aren’t any egregious proofreading errors. The author clearly took the time to proofread this before submitting, a vital step in the submission process.
When I read through the second time, my inner developmental editor awoke and started evaluating the structure of the sample. Before long, I was mentally rearranging various components of the story to create a stronger opening. The issue here is that the first page throws two hefty plot points at us without lingering on either one for long: rugby and Drea.
Starting the story with the three rules of high school rugby suggests to the reader that this is the master plot in this book. Is this correct? If not, if Bruno’s relationship with Drea (and the unnamed girl who has a crush on him) is actually the main event, then you might consider opening with that and weaving in the rugby later. As is, we get only the briefest of primers on the narrator’s status as a rugby player before the story rapidly diverts into Drea’s orbit. This makes the rules of rugby at the beginning feel a bit gratuitous—more like an attempt to engage the reader with a Fight Club–esque breakdown of rules than an actual gateway into the story.
I tend to be a character-driven reader, and I don’t feel like I really connected with Bruno. If we clear away the rugby and his crush on Drea, what do we know about him? This is actually a good gauge for all writers of fiction. If you strip the story of its external plot points, what is left of your protagonist? Is there some meaty internal conflict? Where does this person’s humanity lie? His weaknesses? These are seeds you want to plant from the very beginning to give the reader an immediate understanding of the person driving this narrative bus. Right now, Bruno is somewhat of a blank slate.
At the line editing level: Be careful not to develop what I call the “one-liner” tic. I counted ten one-sentence paragraphs on this page. This can be a hard habit to break. You’re trying to build up the level of suspense, and paragraph breaks can certainly punctuate the story at key moments. But you should rely on this tactic sparingly. The mounting suspense has to come from more than just strategically placed paragraph breaks.
I’d recommend revisiting this first page and thinking about the most important things your reader needs to know from the outset. I’ve been tough on this week’s sample because I want to coax it out of its YA romance boilerplate and into something that will stand out on a shelf. This author writes well, so it’s a matter of turning this into a rich, fully realized first-person story. 
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Thursday, 18 July 2013

Two Writing Tips That Will Help You Draft Your Novel

Posted on 12:29 by Unknown
Well, today is the last day of my blog tour.  Today's reviewer loved the suspense of Ashes Ashes but had a few things to say about the romance.  Want to read what she thought?  Click here

I'd really like to thank everyone who participated.  I loved meeting new friends and reading the reviews.

Last night I was getting ready to sprint and I realized there are two things that are really helping me sit down and breeze through this first draft.

First of all, like I talked about last week, I have a loose outline.  I had someone ask me what my loose outline looks like, so here's the one I used for last night's sprint.


  • Bart is observing Lucy's questioning.  Brings her water.
  • Confrontation with James.
  • Questions from Colby
  • Bart scene with Attorney/Lucy
  • Bart goes to his mother's condo, Lucy's words in his ears
  • His mother reveals the secret.
  • He makes security arrangements for her.
  • He's having a hard time processing what he's just heard and everything that happened that day.

So, that's what I went off of as I was sprinting and laying down the foundation of the chapter.  As I mentioned last week, sprinting is where I can write the first layer, then go back and add more to it later.  I usually am dialogue-heavy at first, and when I revise I add in more description, body language, and setting.

Second, I did have a little personal revelation last night.  Last week, I talked about knowing where the chapter is going before you start drafting, but one thing I noticed that is really helping me with my chapter goals is to ask myself why?  Why is the character doing/acting/thinking this way?  Why does he view the world this way?  Why is this event important?  It's sort of like a little mental checklist of character motivation, and making sure each event is relevant and important in moving the story forward and carrying me to the end.  It made me write little notes in the corner to make sure I'm meeting my character goals and answering those 'why' questions for my readers---which will add to my word count and has already given me ideas for future chapters.  Win/win!

Both of these tips are helping me get through my first draft in record time.  What helps you draft?



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Wednesday, 17 July 2013

We're Sprinting Come Join the Fun!

Posted on 19:01 by Unknown
Okay, people, you know the drill.  Come back in fifteen minutes and check in with your word count.

Ready, set, GO!!
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Word Count Wednesday

Posted on 11:18 by Unknown
Well, the blog tour ends tomorrow and it has been a great ride.  If you still want to enter the drawing for a $25 Amazon gift card, you can do that here

I got one review today from Love.Pray.Read and they said it was a fast-paced and engaging story. You can read the whole review here There's also a spot to enter the drawing for the Amazon gift card there, too.

So, on to word counts.  I did great this week and got 4789 words.  I added two and a half chapters and I am feeling gooooood about this book.  How did you do?

I will be sprinting tonight at 8 p.m. as usual.  I hope you can join me!  Just look for the sprint post so you can check in with us.  See you there!
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Tuesday, 16 July 2013

Book Review: Lifestyles of the Great and Spacious

Posted on 18:49 by Unknown
Well, if you are as dedicated as Debra and are following my blog tour, I got two more reviews today for Ashes Ashes.

The first one was from Hershey Wishes and Kisses (isn't that a great name?) and they said that it was "filled with intense suspense, a heart-pounding plot, and great characters."  Yay!  You can read the whole review here

The second one was from Min Reads and she said it was a fast-paced thriller.  She was also happy to get an update on Rafe and Claire.  I'm glad because I really loved Rafe and Claire, too.  You can see her whole review here

And if you are interested in knowing my top ten TV shows, you can read that list here




Today I'd like to tell you about a little book by John Bytheway.  It's called Lifestyles of the Great and Spacious and while it is a small book, it is full of great concepts and things to ponder.  He goes over the thirty-two verses of Lehi's Dream in the Book of Mormon, offering insights into the metaphor and how it applies in our lives today.

At first I was thinking I would breeze through this small little book, but the more I read, the slower I went because there was a lot to think about. Bytheway presents things in a way I've never really thought of before, even though I've read that passage many times.  I enjoyed the real-life application and the way he offered his insights and observations in a very conversational tone.  I liked that there were humorous moments and serious discussion, much like Bytheway's firesides---fun and serious at the same time.  I think I will definitely read this one more than once just to really let it all sink in.  I thought it was really well done and I felt inspired.

Here is the back copy:

With every passing day, the unforgettable imagery in Lehi’s dream becomes more real and more relevant. In our modern world, we can literally hear the taunts and see the pointing fingers of people like those in the great and spacious building. We find ourselves clinging with greater energy to the rod of iron as we work through the massive mists of darkness toward the tree of life. In Lifestyles of the Great and Spacious, John Bytheway looks at Lehi’s dream, and with his characteristic humor, comments from Church leaders, scholarly insights, and personal experiences, he expands our understanding of these precious verses of scripture.



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